Not exactly an SOS but..

I am glad you people have posted about the '5 a day' issue today because thoughts like this have been crossing my mind quite frequently lately although I know that it is so wrong. It's like I have another me in me. It's really crazy. I am not at a very happy state of mind lately. My departure from my parents place to 'my home' which is half way around the world is coming soon and making me VERY sad. My parents are very old and I am going to be so far away from them again. I am just so afraid not see one of them next time I come back (which is in another year) plus there is no family to take care of them here. I feel super down and sad. I am fighting very hard not to cave in at the moment. Somethign in me tells me that I have started this 'quit' with the wrong attitude and should forget about it and come and do it another time when I am happier and more stable psychologically. Somethign is telling me that this wasnt the right time to quit. It only made things worse for me and the people around me. I am so sorry to post like this nearing 2 months of my quit. Newerbies please forget about my post because I am going thru a lot at the moment in my life. I feel very lonely and indecisive. So many things to think and decide. I am just so fed up of living abroad so far away from home. Hubby doesnt want to move here etc. etc..I amreally hanging in there tough at the moment. I really wish I knew another way to deal with stress and sadness other than the smokes.Thanks for reading my ventSonata